This Is My Life Now

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A plate of beets.

Warm beet salad to be exact. I love this dish. I usually serve with walnuts or pecans. Yesterday our youngest, Nina, at 9 months old was told that she has severe reflux. We went to Instacare in the morning, then we were transferred to Primary Children’s Hospital that afternoon. It explains everything. She is otherwise insanely healthy. But the poor girl has never slept through the night, and almost every night since she was a newborn she gets up every hour… I feel terrible that I didn’t think it was a sign there was something wrong. Every day I just had hope that the next night would be better, and dealt with the sleep deprivation. So, Nina is on medication, probiotics, essential oils, and more snuggles. And I am on the elimination diet. I hate diets, especially when it focuses on what not to eat. So this blows hard. As a mom, I now have to make four different meals for every meal time: toddler, baby, husband, and myself… No grains, only rice, no starch vegetables, no acidic fruit or veggies, no vinegar, no meat except only turkey and scale fish, no dairy, no chocolate, no sugar… and the list probably goes on.

For lunch I put sardines in the center of avocado pears. It was actually delightful, save the fact that the husband and daughter had grilled brie and blackberry sandwiches. And for dinner, the family had burritos, and I ate rice, ground turkey (from the burritos), and waited until my beet finally cooked so I could cut it up and try to fill my belly.

I just want my baby daughter to get better. I will eat a plate a beets for every meal, if that is what it takes, to help her not be in such great pain. So this is my life now. I have a fridge full of vegetables, fruit, and coconut water. Nina is on the road to recovery.

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